Pasta Time with Robin Thede
Pasta Time with Robin Thede
In this episode of the Antidote, hosts Amy Aniobi and Grace Edwards connect with actress and comedian Robin Thede about what her talent built, the ways her design aesthetic calms her, and why she takes the time to finish her lunch.
Amy and Grace share their bummer news of the week - stressful job market! expensive Covid tests! - and also share their antidotes for the week which include fitting in vacation and spending time with loved ones outside of work.
BetterHelp Online Therapy - betterhelp.com/ANTIDOTE
Amy The world is a dumpster fire. I'm Amy.
Grace And I'm Grace.
Amy And we want to help. And fair warning, our help comes with some strong language attached. So hide your kids, like tuck them into bed, it's time to say night night. Because we're about to say some things.
Grace As a reflex to the f—-ing madness on the news, we're keeping it positive, uplifting, but opinionated.
Amy We talk about cultural moments we love.
Grace Talk to people we adore.
Amy Crushes we have.
Grace And self-care we stan.
Amy During these trying times, we all need a show that focuses on joy.
Grace This is The Antidote. Hi, everybody. Welcome to our second episode of The Antidote. Thank you for coming back. We are so appreciative that you're here again.
Amy Yay! Thank you! Warm my little heart.
Grace And let me tell you guys, my friend Amy.
Amy Who, me?
Grace Is looking like a whole ass snack. Like she switched up her hair. It's like, more like a blow out. It's like a beachy wave thing, I mean.
Amy Yeah. Mama got a new wig.
Grace Oh, my goodness. That is a good wig. Like, it looks like it's going right down to your roots, girl.
Amy I mean, literally I feel like the Black woman power to change your look at the drop of a hat and the drop of a few hundred dollars is a phenomenal gift. And even though it's sometimes really annoying, I miss, especially pre-pandemic, like being able to just change my look up every now and then.
Grace Yeah, yeah. I mean, I love it. I mean, you know me, girl, I got braids. Right now I have faux locs.
Amy Your faux locs are bangin, like y'all. I'm always here for a faux locs moment and Grace, like she whips those things around. I'm like, yes, whatever you want, I shall do it. All right. Well, let's get into the show.
Grace Well, we can't have The Antidote if we don't have something to get an antidote from.
Amy So we're starting now up top with our bummer news.
Grace Oh, no.
Amy It's all about the great resignation. Basically, 4.4 million Americans have quit their jobs in the last month. Not year, in the last month, because there's so much dissatisfaction with working conditions, uninspiring jobs, bad bosses. It's literally gone global. Everyone is like, I'm done, I'm out self-care moment. I literally saw a tweet a couple of weeks ago that a boss had sent all these tasks to his assistant to do in a text message, and the assistant responded, it's giving shackles I quit.
Grace I actually live. Who is that icon? I need to find this person, follow them on Twitter forever.
Amy They covered their name to protect them. It said it's giving shackles.
Grace It's giving shackles. I quit. You know, there are some times in my life I should have said shit. You know what I'm saying?
Amy Yes, 100%. But I think the reason it's happening, it's like, money is spread thin because of the pandemic and people are expecting more from all of their employees. And we're also burnt out because we've been in fight or flight slash like crisis trauma mode for two years running. It's really indicative of the fact that we have not learned as a society to prioritize self-care. But like, that's what bums me out. I'm like glad that people are leaving jobs that don't inspire them. But I'm also sad because it's indicative of a bigger problem. Capitalism.
Grace I mean, and, you know, you and I, we talk about, you know, we are crazy busy. But I actually was talking to a friend earlier today and I was just like, you know, my life is insane right now. There's so much to do. But I feel so blessed by the fact that I enjoy all of it. So part of me, like, it's like, Oh, this is great. People are standing up for themselves. But you're right, it's true that there shouldn't be so many bad working conditions that fully four and a half million people quit their jobs, that, that super sucks. Yeah, that's that's that's bananas.
Amy In a month. And then on top of that, our second piece of bummer news. What it also makes me scared about is that free COVID tests and treatments are no longer free for the uninsured. So all these people who have quit their jobs who are like probably getting exposed to COVID just because they live in America and people be mask free 2022. Now they don't even get free COVID tests. And basically there was this program that used to reimburse clinics and hospitals for the testing, as well as for treating uninsured patients with COVID 19. And they literally stopped the claims because they, they're like, we can't accept any more claims because we have lack of sufficient funds. And now people will be charged $125 for testing and $100 if they go through a physician's office. And basically, people have taken it to Congress being like, hey, can we get more funding for this? And of course, Republicans objected.
Grace Oh, my God. I mean, just in time, because let me tell you.
Grace She is Molly whopping her ass right into America right now. So.
Amy Wait, we went back to the top of the alphabet? I thought we got. We haven't even gotten to Zetacron. Why are we back at Deltacron?
Grace Yeah, I don't know. Now, all the mask mandates are going down. The vaccine mandates are going down. And just in time for this new variant to be like, Hey, girl, I'm here. And now, people can't even get tested for free.
Amy And let's not forget that as of March 28th, an average number of about 18,000 Americans are still hospitalized with COVID 19 per day and 3000 are in ICUs and 753 are dying. So it's not like this thing is over.
Grace I'm literally outside a CVS every day, like a crackhead. Like, give me another shot. Give me another one. I'm just like. So give me another one of them boosters, baby. You know what? Keep- let me keep some at my house. I'll put it. I'll put it in myself.
Amy I'll be smart. I'll only boost every 3 to 6 months. Don't worry, just leave me with the shots, I'll be responsible with the booster.
Grace You know, I'll put a clean syringe every time or whatever. Just give me some of that sweet, sweet booster shot.
Amy Last bit of bummer news. This one just bummed me out. I saw that Bruce Willis is stepping away from acting because he has aphasia. And I have heard of aphasia. But just for people who don't know, it's actually described as a neurological condition that affects a person's ability to communicate verbally or through writing. And it affects an estimated 2 million people in the United States per year, according to the National Aphasia Association. It can stop how you speak. It can stop how you communicate. And of course, as an actor, you have to memorize lines. So his daughter, Rumer Willis, broke the news and literally said he's stepping away from the career that he loves so much. And he's 67. He's not that old. And for that to happen after his illustrious career and all that, like Bruce Willis, like.
Grace Everyone fucks with Bruce Willis. Can I just get that out? Clearly everyone fucks with Bruce Willis because he fine, he up. He's like a bald headed king. Thank you, Bruce Willis for your service. And also, that's just very sad. I mean, you know, my dad is 82. He's still working. And, you know, I'm thinking of him at 67 having to step away from things. And yeah, that's too young if you still really love something to do that. But, you know, he's got to take care of himself. And I hope that, you know, whatever treatments they're giving him are at least making him comfortable. And, you know what a wonderful actor. Yeah.
Amy That's the bummer news for this week. How do you feel, Grace?
Grace Well, I don't feel good. How about you?
Amy I'm pretty shitty.
Grace Okay. Well, let's get into the antidote!
Amy So for those of you just joining us, this is the segment where we tell you about the culture we consumed or the things we did this week that made us feel better about the bummer news. So, yeah, Grace, what was your antidote this week?
Grace As we speak, I am sitting in a Baltimore, Maryland, in a hotel overlooking the harbor. It's my birthday weekend, so it's a poorly timed trip. It's a poorly timed trip. I mean.
Amy Who cares? Treat yourself!
Grace I have so much work to do. I should probably be in Los Angeles, in my office, doing the things that I always do, but I sort of set like this boundary, like, listen, Grace, you're, you have a lot of work right now, and that's not going to change. It's actually going to get worse, especially if the things that you want come to pass. So I'm, so I'm starting now, starting today, starting on this trip, it's like I'm not going to let work, take away opportunities for me to be somewhere else. So before this, I went to my parents house in Michigan and it was lovely. I was still working, but I got to kiss my mom's face. I got to hang out with my sweet brother, you know, I got to see my dad, you know? But it was nice. I was in my childhood bedroom and I was like, I'm working on this amazing new show that's coming out on Netflix starring Michelle Buteau. And so, like, we're in my childhood bedroom and I'm showing them pictures of like when I was Dorothy in The Wiz and all my show choir pictures. And I'm literally looking through all my drawers and seeing like my old Girl Scout books and stuff like that. And then after I leave Baltimore because my friend is getting married in Baltimore, that's the reason why I'm here. He's getting married on my birthday, which was shade, because he's known me since we were 14. So they know where my birthday's at. So he didn't need to get married on my birthday.
Amy He did not do that to offend you! He probably did that because of pricing.
Grace I mean, I love you, Justin, and I'm obviously here. I love you, and I'm obviously here, so I'm not that mad about it. But. But then after his wedding, on my birthday, then I'm going to New York for a week and still I am going to be working a lot. But I told my assistant to leave my evenings free, so I'll get to see friends at night. I'll get to see business contacts and people that I've hung out with for years that I used to live in New York with. So I just love the fact that I took this poorly timed vacation. Because even though there's so much work that has to go on during the vacation. I'm still stealing moments of joy, stealing moments of connection. So I feel like it's so important, even when you have a ton of work or you have a lot of obligations in your life, that you still make time to, like steal those moments. So that's what I'm doing this week. I'm stealing moments in between the work that I have to be somewhere else. Feel a different energy. Feel a different city. And yeah, and because I'm moving around so much, I really don't have time to focus on all the bummer news and all the things that are going on in the world. Because I got to get on a plane. Oh, snap. I got to repack this bag. Oh, snap. Did I remember my podcast recording equipment? Like, you know, I have to do all that stuff. So it feels good to be distracted from the routine of life, to be somewhere else and kick up like some new energy. So.
Amy Yeah, and you're trying not to become one of these 4.4 million people who quits their job. You know, it's like that's what it's about is mental health, self-care, boundaries. You were like literally living that in practice. And sometimes it's hard. Like you keep on calling it an ill timed trip, but when is the right time to take care of yourself? Like, you know, so I'm just like it, it's hard to set boundaries and to protect your peace. But you're doing it. You're living it. And I think that's incredible. That's a beautiful antidote.
Grace Well, thank you. And I'm just curious, what is your antidote this week been?
Amy LOL, we have a very similar antidote because I'm also on vacation. I am recording this podcast from lovely Maui, Hawaii. I'm here for a bachelorette weekend with one of my closest friends in the world. Her name's Zoe and she wanted to do her bachelor in Hawaii. I've never been to Hawaii, I had never been there before. And I was like, it's really hard for me to, like, commit to getting away. And, and I love vacation. I actually really feel like traveling rejuvenates my creativity. It always makes me tap into my writing in a new way. So the flight getting out of town, like you're saying, it kind of rejuvenates my ability to focus on my work when I get back. So I was really happy that they decided to do Maui instead of something that was like super local because it kind of forced me to get out and then I got, you know, my new hair and then I also.
Grace And it's gorgeous.
Amy Exactly. And then I have a view of the ocean outside of my hotel room. And yeah, it's it's been incredible. I literally am like, it's in a weird way. Like, I've lived internationally, I've been all over the world. I love to travel, I love vacationing, and I've never been to Hawaii. And it feels like so, it feels novel to me. It's like me on this island and like and I will say there has been a lot of talk during the pandemic about not going to Hawaii so that, to protect the locals. And it has been a complicated conversation for me because I'm like I have complicated feelings around going to tourist destinations during a pandemic. And I, what I will say about our group is that like we are the most hardcore, like testing every 10 seconds, like we're so insane about safety and we really decided to do it in a really protective way for us and to not like, you know, be in Hawaii, like littering on the street or whatever. So, but I am like, hey, I'm coming here and, and wanting to experience it and be as kind to the island as possible. And it's so funny, the videos, you know how the hotel TV has like a loop of like, welcome to our hotel type videos. All of the videos are about like literally they say, we have sacrificed so much to allow you to keep coming here. Like the video says that. And they're like, please protect our island. This is Ohana. You are part of our family. Please protect our island. And it's like really moving. I like sat and watched the whole little entry video and I was like, I hope these white people up in here are listening to this video because I'm feeling it deep.
Grace I mean, it's like kind of White Lotus talked about it a little bit. Yeah, yeah.
Amy Just to throw this in, the first night I got here at this resort, this, I was walking through a hallway and this random Black woman who's a guest at this resort saw me and goes, Hello!
Grace Oh, my God. She was just like my sister.
Amy She sis-ed herself. Yeah she's like, I just haven't met you yet and there aren't a lot of us here. I was like, so nice to meet you. It was so sweet, so on that we'll just keep on enjoying our vacation vibes right after this break.
Grace Welcome back to The Antidote. We have a special guest today. Who is it, Amy?
Amy Our guest today is a comedian, actor, writer, showrunner, as well as executive producer, creator and star of the Emmy Award winning HBO sketch comedy series A Black Lady Sketch Show. We stan for a bad bitch support group.
Grace And Black lady courtroom.
Amy She was the head writer for The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore, making her the first Black woman in history to hold that position. And so glamorously, too. And she also was the first Black woman head writer for the White House Correspondents Dinner. She was named one of Variety's top ten comics to watch. And she is one of my personal top ten Instagrams to watch because y'all the cheekbones. Make like Doja Cat and get into it yuh. Please welcome Robin Thede.
Robin Thede That may have been the best intro I have literally ever had in my entire life. I'm going to bottle it up. Thank you very much.
Grace Well, Robin, you are very impressive, but we aren't here to talk about your many, many, many accomplishments. We're here to get deep.
Robin Thede Yes. Okay, let's do it.
Amy Let's check in first. How are you feeling today? Like, for real, not small talk. Is there anything that's weighing on you?
Robin Thede Oh, sure, the world. But I will say thank you because you let me finish making my pasta for lunch. And I bring this up because old me write pre-pandemic me or even pre a year ago me would have just said, forget it, pass out, die, don't eat. You're supposed to be somewhere at 2:00 and no one's going to understand of your late. And what I've realized is in the pandemic is. No. If I need 5 minutes, it's not the end of the world and just ask for it like I don't want to die tomorrow knowing that I didn't take 5 minutes to make lunch. And, you know, I made this beautiful cauliflower pasta. This pesto and kale? Yeah, it's fantastic. It's a vegan pasta. It's a cauliflower pasta by Banza, which I really like. Tons of protein, not a lot of carbs, if you care about those things. And a vegan pesto that I did not make, but I bought and then I sauteed some kale and did some, you know, salt and pepper and some things and just a beautiful pasta in the middle of the day.
Amy Ladies and gentlemen, she's a chef.
Grace Let, let me add it to the bio.
Robin Thede Normally, normally I would make my own pesto, but I had to get the lunch ready of like 8 minutes. But but it was that sort of thing. That's that kind of like, you know, we talk about self care and we always ask each other, how are you checking in with your self, with your friends, etc., etc.? And for me, I need to be kinder to myself in a lot of ways. I'm my own harshest critic, but I'm also bad to my body sometimes. Yeah. And this body is the only one I got. So I've tried to stop beating myself up about the things I don't like about my body, which obviously are not many.
Grace Yas queen, you better say that shit.
Amy I was like, What would that be?
Robin Thede Even making a joke like that is like for me, because normally I go into.
Grace Like this sort of like it's like.
Robin Thede No, forget that. Like this is the one body I'm blessed with and I need to love every inch of it. And that includes feeding myself when all the other years I would have just gone until 10 p.m. without eating and that's not frickin healthy. So yeah. So I took, I took the time.
Amy Well, you know, we want to get into the show. The show is called The Antidote, as you know.
Robin Thede Congratulations, by the way. This is so dope. Two of my favorite people.
Amy Ohh, thank you. So I'm curious, is your antidote this week cooking for yourself, making yourself a little meal?
Robin Thede Yeah, for today it is. I mean, you know, I also, in my mind am a secret dog owner. I don't own a dog, a dog. But we were raised with Welsh Corgis. Ones where they don't have tails. And so I have a notebook where. Oh it's downstairs, but I have a notebook that has a corgi on it and it says a little corgi makes your day a little better. So in my mind, I've been toying with this idea of getting a puppy.
Amy Oh, my God. Would you?
Robin Thede I don't think so, because I just, I move around too much and I'm just too busy, and I don't want to pick up poop, but. In some ways, just even looking at the puppies or watching little YouTube videos up there makes me happy. Just small things, you know, just little things.
Amy I love a puppy video. I also love when it's like unlikely animal friends, you know? Like, a puppy and a duck.
Robin Thede I love it. And it's always like a wolf and a cat. Like, what are you doing? Why are they friends?
Grace Or, like, a duck and a goat.
Robin Thede Duck and a goat. Yeah, duck and a goat. It would be good.
Amy I don't think I could get a pet. But I also find an antidote of mine is looking at other people's pets from a distance. It's like babies. I mean, you're cute over there.
Amy Totally. And that's the thing. There's no like there's no risk just Googling them. You don't have to pick up their poop.
Grace Yeah, that's the part that I don't like, the poop part.
Robin Thede Do you have an animal, Grace?
Grace For the same reasons. Like, I like to be able to move freely and not have to worry about, like, you know, where to put them or whatever. But I am more of a cat person than a dog person. And.
Robin Thede All right, we can move on now.
Grace Let me let me let me explain myself first! So I'm more of a cat person, more than a dog person, because cats are fucking real. That's what I'm talking about cats are fucking real. Dogs, always happy to see you. Oh, they're always licking and whatever, jumping on you. But a cat will let you know how she feel at any given moment.
Robin Thede You're talking to the wrong audience. Yeah. I mean, I appreciate the speech, but my roommate in college had a cat who sent her to the hospital.
Amy In college?
Robin Thede Yeah.
Amy That's rude, first of all.
Grace That's why you don't like cats. It's trauma. It's PTSD. From that time.
Robin Thede I've ever liked them, I think. Why would I want an animal who's going to spite you every day I come home? I get that in my life. I can get that from a man. Why would I want that from a cat?
Grace I like it. I'm like, make me work for it. Make me work for it. Okay.
Robin Thede Girl, bring that up in therapy. Don't put that on me. Yeah.
Amy I would say you've come a long way from having a college roommate. You're in a beautiful home. Which, by the way, we're just seeing a corner of it. She won't show it to us, but. Oh, it's beautiful. The corner we're seeing is lovely.
Robin Thede The rest is just shambles.
Amy And I got to assume, like, you're someone like you work a lot, you're on sets a lot, you travel a lot for work. Like what is it like coming home? Is home like a place where you get to finally relax and feel more like yourself?
Robin Thede Yes, yeah. Yes. And I have set it up that way. My house is very white and very-
Amy White people?
Robin Thede Whi- white people.
Amy Like white supremacy?
Robin Thede Have you guys heard of the KKK? Oh, my God.
Grace Oh, my God. Is that the reason why that lamb has a hood on it? So cute.
Robin Thede All lamps have a hood!
Amy Oh, they're all trying to fight me.
Robin Thede Oh, no. Twitter's just ablaze. Oh.
Amy No y mean white as in serene.
Robin Thede No, it's very serene. It's very like people always come in my house and I go, Is this a model home? And I'm like, it's not a gated community. I don't understand why it would be a model home, but no, it's not. Or they'll go, oh, is this still the stage front?
Amy Wait, what? No, I think I like you because my house is like that. Like my living room is very like it is how it is. Like my pillows are in the middle here on either side. I there's something to me that's comforting about just.
Robin Thede Walking into serenity. Yeah. I walk in like, I think most people like, my crazy brain and all the characters, like all the comedy I do would think my house would be, like, colorful. And it's like that always very like gray invasion, white and like some blush elements. But then I will say my family room in my kitchen, which is all kind of one area, it's like navies and grays and blues and like a much more comfortable kid. My nieces and nephews can jump off the couches and do all of that, but my bedroom is like white and cream and blush and that's it. And like, my living room is the same. My formal living room is the same way. Ooh, I'm bougie formal living room.
Grace Yeah, I was two living rooms, must be nice.
Robin Thede Yeah. Somebody said, somebody said if your couches don't touch the wall you rich and I'm like, oh my couches don't touch the wall.
Grace This one touches the wall. But I got another one that don't touch the wall. So maybe I'm rich too.
Robin Thede See you got two couches so you rich.
Amy I know what I heard was multiple couches.
Grace Amy has an estate okay, so first of all, I don't. I don't know why she always trying to downplay how nice our house is.
Amy Stop right there.
Grace Three floors.
Robin Thede Amy and I have the same desk.
Amy Yeah, we do. We have the same office desk, and I absolutely love it. I remember seeing it for the first time on Zoom with you and I, like, had a kenipchin because I was just like, Oh my God. My style icon has my desk. I'm like, How did this happen?
Grace To the follow to last question, would you say that home is your favorite place? What? What is like your favorite place to be? Just in general?
Robin Thede Oh my God. Italy is my favorite country to be here. Hands down. It's just so beautiful. As you know, from my pasta adventure today, I learned how to make pasta in Italy. That's the other thing, guys. I didn't make my own pasta today. I didn't make my own pasta. I could of. I have a possum. Wow. I can't. I know how. But yeah, I, but anyway, so Italy, I would say is my favorite country. But yeah, home. Home is my favorite place and I am a bit of a homebody. Not no way of like I don't like seeing people, but just in a way of like the pandemic has forced me to be. And I do think I replenish my energy at home for sure.
Grace I feel the same way. And we also love Italy because me and Amy went on a trip last summer. We went to Sicily.
Robin Thede I know.
Amy Even thinking about and I don't want to get like super heavy on the pandemic of it all, but that's so much of why we even started this podcast, is we missed each other and missed being able to like find joy. And I remember you posting on Instagram about like how to maintain friendships during the pandemic. And that was like, hit me in my heart because I was like, this is how I feel every single day, and I'm sure a lot of people can relate to that. I'm curious like what has been your way to form community during this crazy time and, and what have you found has helped?
Robin Thede I'm so glad you brought that up because I'm rarely vulnerable on my Instagram. Like it's usually, like you said, just cheekbones and that we move on.
Amy Literally the best.
Robin Thede But yeah, I think for me, I put up this really vulnerable post that was about how much I love my friends, but how also I feel like I've kind of been a bad friend over the past two years to many a two year old. So just so many of my friends that I love so dearly because I haven't found the courage to have the sort of social life that we all used to have. And I just don't have it. And the thing is, like, I make television 11 months and 28 days of the year. I have about three days between seasons. Yep, on A Black Lady Sketch Show. Even though people think even though people like it's only six episodes, why would that take you a year? And I'm like, You have no idea the epic size and scope and how long it takes to make television.
Grace Takes so much.
Robin Thede But for me, I have a responsibility to my crew. Even when I'm in post, you know, when I'm editing the show, I still have to go to color and sound mixes in person. That means I cannot be COVID positive. I also have an autoimmune disease and I had COVID in January of 2020 and it was it damn near killed me. So I and I said without no hyperbole, like I literally could not breathe and told my mom I might stop breathing in my sleep like I it was awful. And this was before we knew anything about. Yeah, right. So two of the three seasons of the schedule had been made during a global pandemic. It's so stressful and my friends are all like, Well, I'm not even going to come to your house because I don't want to get you sick, you know? So it's like at the end of the day. I do feel like in so many ways I'm lacking as a friend and no friends have made me feel that way, of course. But I was so happy to see the responses from people saying the same thing. Amy, you were saying, which was same and nobody faults you. Like all of our friendships kind of.
Amy Suffered, felt a hit.
Robin Thede Suffered just because of that. Yeah. And the thing I am learning is that all my friends are great because I still miss them so much and want them so much. And, you know, there wasn't anybody that I'm like to thank God for that pandemic, so I can cut that off. You know, there was nothing that I remember when I saw the two of you at an event. I don't know if we should say what it was, but I saw that you be at an event a few months. Yeah. Can I say, who cares about that? Yeah.
Amy Yeah, everybody tested, it was great.
Robin Thede Yeah, like everybody tested, it was the safest.
Amy Anyway, but.
Robin Thede It was the safest. It was outside. Everybody was tested and or vaccinated, and I still wouldn't take off my mask. Yeah, like, I'm still just one of those people. And I think I was shooting at the time.
Amy You were, because I remember.
Robin Thede Yeah. Because that thing for me, I'm like, okay, I'm coming to your birthday because I love you and I'm obsessed and I haven't seen you in forever, but I'm putting 200 people's lives and jobs at risk by doing it, you know, and it just sucks, you know? And so anyway, I'm just trying to be more gentle with myself about some of the friendships I haven't been able to like, you know, maintain as much as normal.
Amy I'm loving, like just being able to reminisce about some of these great times that we've managed to have even in the pandemic. And because it's like sometimes you're thinking about like, Oh, what did I do last week? And it's like I sat in my house, but there were some bright spots like I even think of first. Sure. Yeah. Like even I started staging in my house every now and then. I never used to have time.
Robin Thede I'm here for your, listen, your sage and candle Instagram. This is what I'm living for.
Amy Last question for you and then we'll let you get back to your pasta. I know earlier last year you said that you get hard on yourself for not being where you want to be sometimes, but then you think about how proud your six year old self would be of you. And I'm like, there are days where I'm like, Oh yeah, that's true. I've come further than I ever dreamed. And then there are days where it doesn't quite fit, you know? And I'm curious, like, what conversation for for that six year old girl who has so many dreams ahead of her, what would that conversation sound like to tell her, hey, girl, it's going to be fine. So let you be in the space where you know you're okay.
Robin Thede I love that you brought that up because ever since I posted that, you know, when you when you're when you think you're not where you're supposed to be, think about how proud your six year old self would be of you. I have really internalized that as my mantra. And when I'm ever feeling like, Oh, well, this show didn't go. I was developing this show and we put out a press announcement. Now it's dead, you know, da da da da. That's a normal in this business. And like or, you know, I keep thinking, oh, god, I used to be on TV every day and now I'm on TV six episodes a year and like, am I falling out of the spotlight? Am I not keeping up the energy of my career? Do people even care about what I'm making? I'm like, Do they have any idea how good what I'm about to release is or how long this takes? Do they appreciate that or do they just think, Oh, she'll never be bigger than she is because of blah blah blah, right? So all that negative self-talk. But then I, I thought about this this morning in a new way. I looked around and I go, Look at this place you live, right? And no matter how big or small, right.
Amy Yes, yeah.
Robin Thede I just go, my talent built this, my talent built this, nothing else but my hard work and my talent. And I say that because my talent has taken care of me. I have never had a loan from anybody. No man has ever paid my bills. My parents have never paid my bills. No shade to anybody who's doing that. Because.
Amy I mean if you got the hustle, keep it.
Robin Thede You know, that part? That part. I have accomplished so many things based on my talent. Why would I ever get down on myself if something didn't work out? And I do believe if something doesn't happen, it's not meant to be. And I believe in that divine order for sure. So now I'm just getting so much better about taking things in stride. I have a movie that was announced. It's at Amazon.com, killing it. It's Shaun of the Dead meets Girls Trip, and we're in development for that. Yeah. And I'm hoping that it goes through and so you guys can see it in your theaters and everything's fine. But things take time, right? Like people ask me what what's going on with that? And I'm like, Oh, it just takes time, you know? And I can't get down on myself if something doesn't go or something's taking too long. But at the same time, there's always that fight of going, Oh, you're getting older, people are going to want you when you're looking older or whatever. But I had to get rid of that too, because a I did decide to age backwards. So that's been lovely. It's happened. I just decided like like a month ago I was just like, Yeah, oh, I'm going to age backwards. Yeah. I just decide I feel like my.
Grace Manifest it sis.
Robin Thede Whatever is for me is for me and leave everything else, you know, it's like I've spent so much of my life trying to control what I can, when the truth is that whatever is outside of your control will not be affected by you trying to. Control that. So yeah, so I said tobacco control. And I also had to just really more than just gratitude rights. I was doing like gratitude journals and all that kind of stuff, but I kicked it up to another notch when I was like, Look at every look at this pillow, look at this chair, look at this laptop, look at this desk, look at this car, your talent. But that you and it's not about the material thing. My sense of safety, my sense of accomplishment is not just rooted in those material things, but it's rooted in the environment that I've created for myself in my life. And that's huge. As somebody who grew up with nothing on welfare, like my parents had to work so hard just to barely scrape by. It's like, never forget that. Never forget that. I don't care if I make a knock on wood, but I don't care if I never make another television show again. I'm not going to lie.
Grace Yeah, you will, for sure.
Robin Thede I will, but see what I had to because-.
Amy You right because also, your talent is you.
Robin Thede That's right. And that will never go away. And if you believe in God, then God has gotten me this far because I think God and talent is the same.
Grace Is the same.
Robin Thede But whatever you believe, it is your talent that has got you there, wherever you believe that talent comes from. And I believe it comes from a higher source. So that's the other thing that's nice is that I'm not one of those who was like, God, God, I'll do it. God got me. And then don't do nothing. It's like.
Amy Na na na na na.
Robin Thede I've been working very hard and I will not rest until I see my goals accomplished. But at the same time, I'm also going to stop beating. I have stopped beating myself up when things don't go the way that I had thought. Because here's the last thing I'll say. Everything that didn't work out. My God. Thank you. Yeah, everything that did not work out. I think about praying to be on SNL. And when I auditioned in 2013, I was like, This is it. This is I have been submitting for ten years. And I was like, Please, please, this is it. I'm finally here up in front of Lorne Michaels. Is this is it? This is it. Didn't get it. Wow. And I was like, my sketch dreams are over. I had done six other sketch shows at that point, either writing, performing, guest, starring with all this other stuff. And I was like, This is it, this is SNL. I'm going to make it. Didn't make it. And I was like, Well, I have to get a new dream now. And I was already and then I got the Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore, and then I did my own late night show. And on both of those shows, I was doing sketches left and right and it didn't leave me. I know, right? I never left me. I was like, Well, that dream's over. I literally said that like, Oh, well, that thing's over. No more sketch. I'll just do something else in comedy. And I literally only went on to do sketches that I wanted to do and then created a Black Lady sketch show. And the rest is history, literal, literal, right? So it's like even when you think you're giving up on your dream, you're dream ain't going nowhere.
Amy It ain't going nowhere.
Grace I go back to that in my life, like everything that didn't work out or whatever. Now I can look back and I can see how that was leading me in the right direction. So I think that that's like a beautiful lesson in that when things don't work out, it could be that it's leading you to an even better place, because if you had been on SNL, you would have been there for probably five, ten years and a black lady sketch show wouldn't have happened. You know what I'm saying?
Robin Thede I would have been dating Pete Davidson.
Amy Slinging that community peen.
Robin Thede Oh, my God, it would have been terrible. But, you know, the funny thing is that in my personal life, I think about all the men. I said, Please, God, just let him call me one. It would have been terrible.
Amy The way we've been saved.
Grace I thank God. Every day. Every day for that one.
Amy Oh, what?
Amy Well, just the way out. The way out of a relationship, too. I mean, all of that kind of stuff is just like, oh, the blessings. Yeah, but I do believe that.
Amy I love that. I love that it's so real. So this is the end of our conversation. Do you have anything coming up you want to tell us about? I know you can't say much about season three, but I think you'd like to know it could even be something you're not involved in that you just love.
Robin Thede I'll just say this. A Black Lady Sketch Show season three is coming soon. I'm very excited about it. And it's our most epic season.
Grace Oh, my God. I can't wait.
Robin Thede Yes.
Amy And on that note, we will end this interview. And thank you so much, Robin, for coming on and giving us the life today. Thank you.
Grace Now we are doing our creative tap in, in which we tap tap tap in to our creativity. Amy and I are both writers, so being creative brings us joy. And this is a podcast about joy.
Amy So Grace is going to surprise me with a quote about creativity, and I'm going to let her know what it makes me think.
Grace Here's the quote. Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or how. The moment you know, how you begin to die a little. The artist never entirely knows. We guess we may be wrong, but we take a leap after leap in the dark. Let me say it one more time. Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or how. The moment you know how you begin to die a little. The artist never entirely knows. We guess we may be wrong, but we take leap after leap in the dark. And that's by Agnes de Mille.
Amy Wow. That was deep. I was like, living. Is that a form of not being? Sure. I was like, Huh? And then it was like knowing how you begin to die a little. I was like, How about that? But I will say, I think when you continue to grow as a creative, as a person, as you stay curious, as you keep on reaching for new things to know, you stay creative. Hmm. And if you think you've learned everything, your creativity starts to die. But not. Not just your life. But I think of, like, to be honest, those comedians who are all like pissy comedy. I can't. And I'm like, Aren't you supposed to continue to work on your craft? Comedy doesn't age well. You have to update your craft. And if you don't choose to lean into the space of not knowing the the leap after leap in the dark, if you don't lean into that, your voice becomes irrelevant. You as a comedic force, as a creative, can begin to die. This is why I believe in lifelong education and like self-help or whatever. You got to do therapy. All the things that you can do to keep on growing. Because I actually do this on first. Listen, I was like, what? But now I'm like, No, I fully, fully believe this quote because it is like, yeah, once you think you have learned how to do what you were put here to do, that is the minute that your creative energy begins to die.
Grace Amazing. I love that. What this makes me think of and it's so interesting because I always pick these quotes before we talk to our guests. But this actually brings up something for me that Robin said when she was like, when I didn't get SNL and God had another plan or the universe another plan that makes me think of all the many times in my life where I thought that I could control the way things went. And when it says living is a form of not being sure, I feel like when my creativity really began to explode was when I stopped trying to guess what's next. Because before I was just like, okay, well, I'm working on a sketch show, so I have to do a sketch thing because that is the natural next step. And those are where I have the most connections and everything like that. So I wasn't coming to it from a place of What do I want to do? What am I most interested in? It was more of like trying to fit myself in whatever box or modality that I was closest to. So now I literally just seek out what I want to do and I don't try to control everything. And that, like, really releases my creativity because it's not me trying to guess what the best next move is. It's more like me coming first from my creativity and what interests me instead of trying to control everything. And I've become, like, comfortable enough to not be sure. Like, you know, earlier in my career I would be like, well, if this doesn't happen by this point or whatever, I have failed. Or I was just like, the next thing I'm going that is going to happen is this. And now I'm just like, whatever comes across my desk or whatever my agent sends me, I'll take a look at it. If I like it, I'll do it. If I don't like it, I don't do it. I have absolutely no clue what I will be doing or where I will be this time next year. And I'm comfortable with that. I'm fine with that.
Amy I love that we both had different ways of interpreting the quote.
Grace And it's so funny how often that it sort of aligns with something that our guests have said, you know, I like this part of the podcast.
Amy You can say it out loud. You can say with all your put some face on that.
Grace I like this part of the podcast.
Amy Me too.
Grace Well, thanks for listening to The Antidote. We hope this injected a little bit of joy into your week. I know it did mine. How about you, Amy?
Amy I feel good, girl. We should do this again sometime. Oh, we'll be here next week.
Grace And in the meantime, if you'd like to follow us on social, follow me. Grace. At Gracey Act, that's g r a c y a c t.
Amy And follow me Amy at Amy Aniobi that's a m y a n i o b i and follow the show at The Antidote Pod.
Grace And that's a the with two e's.
Amy If you like feeling good about yourself, please subscribe at Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.
Amy And look at everything you built.
Amy The Antidote is hosted by us, Amy, Aniobi and Grace Edwards. It's produced by Jennifer Hansard and our associate producer is Taylor Commodore.
Grace Our executive producer is Erica Krauss and our editor is Erika Janik. Sound Mixing by Alex Simpson.
Amy Digital Production by Mijoe Sahiouni. Talent booking by Marion Wales. Our theme music was composed and produced by Titi the Artist and Cosmo the Truth.
Grace APM studio executives in charge are Lily Kim, Alex Shepherd and Joanne Griffith. Concept created by Amy Aniobi and Grace Edwards.
Amy Send us your antidotes at Antidote show dot org and remember to follow us on social media at the Antidote Pod. That's the with two e's.
Grace The antidote is a production of American Public Media. Bye!
Amy Bye bye!