Nail Art with Amber Ruffin

Amber Ruffin The Antidote

Nail Art with Amber Ruffin

In this episode of The Antidote, hosts Amy Aniobi and Grace Edwards connect with comedian, writer and actress Amber Ruffin about braids, painting nails, taking a break from the news and the secret to self-love. 

Amy and Grace share their bummer news of the week: Airlines dropping the mask mandate and Black and brown NYC residents waiting for millions in emergency aid. Amy & Grace also share their antidotes for the week, including their love for streaming TV.


BetterHelp Online Therapy -


Amy The world is a dumpster fire. I'm Amy.

Grace And I'm Grace.

Amy And we want to help. And fair warning. Our help comes with some strong language attached. So maybe tuck some little cotton balls into the ears of your little ones, because we bout to say some things.

Grace As a reflex to the f---ing madness on the news we're keeping it positive, uplifting, but opinionated.

Amy We talk about cultural moments we love.

Grace Talk to people we adore.

Amy Crushes we have.

Grace And self-care we stand.

Amy During these trying times. We all need a show that focuses on joy.

Grace This is The Antidote. Hi, everybody. Welcome to another episode of our show, The Antidote. We are so grateful that you are here with us today.

Amy Yeah, it literally means so much. We've been seeing people rating us five stars on on Apple Podcasts and leaving beautiful reviews and tagging us on Instagram and Twitter. And it's just amazing. Thank you so much.

Grace Thank you for tagging us in your stories. Thank you for sending us love in our DMS. Thank you for, you know, telling a friend about the show. Thank you for telling your mama about the show your daddy, your cousin. Thank you so much for all the love. And Amy, did you hear that Oprah.

Amy What?

Grace Oprah, yes. Has heard.

Amy Well, to be completely accurate, Oprah Daily has heard.

Grace Okay.

Amy But you know what?

Grace It's got Oprah in it.

Amy You right, Oprah Daily is adjacent to Queen Oprah herself. So in my mom's eyes, we friends with Oprah.

Grace But but thank you for all of the beautiful press that we've received. We will continue to try to bring you a show that you enjoy and cool guests that you like to listen to. All right. So anyway, moving on from the little love fest, we can't have the antidote if we don't have something to get an antidote from, unfortunately.

Amy Starting now, up top with our bummer news of the week. This first one, Grace, it's really a bummer. You heard about how these airlines are dropping the mask mandate.


Grace Yes, I did hear. Some people are very happy about it. I on the other hand, I'm very sad.


Amy Yeah, I'm very sad. It fills me with a sense of dread and panic because it feels like like isn't how this sh-- spread in the first place, like people getting on planes sick. And then and I know people are saying that like, oh, they've changed the air filtration in the plane. But what I do know is pre-pandemic, every flight I ever took, I felt a little sick afterwards. And with the mask, that doesn't happen.


Grace Listen. So let's talk first about Naomi Campbell, f---ing icon of the skies. Okay? Okay.


Amy She knew before any of us.


Grace I used to get sick on every single flight that I took, but then I never had- did the mask like she did before the pandemic. But I did start wiping down everything, and that helped. But literally, I used to get a cold every time. We do know that COVID is airborne.


Amy Yeah.


Grace And we do know that the longer the time you spend around a person that is infected, whether you have a mask on or you don't have a mask on, you are likely more likely to get infected the longer time you spend with someone. So on a flight, even if I have my mask on, if I'm sitting next to somebody COVID, guess who's getting COVID?


Amy Yeah.


Grace Grace.


Amy Yeah, exactly. It makes me so angry that literally a single federal judge, some dork from Florida, knocked down the Biden administration's public transportation mask mandate. And now, like literally flight attendants, we're going up and down the aisles collecting masks. And I saw a video where this woman was immunocompromised and filled with terror on her flight as they were cheering and taking masks from other people. And she was like, did they have to announce this mid-flight? It's like you couldn't wait till people land it. It's so disrespectful. It just assumes it's so hard for me when organizations just assume that what they want to happen is the norm for everyone. You are a company that serves all different types of people, so to just assume that like everyone's going to be cool with the masks coming off is so wild to me.


Grace I also I'm just like, yeah, let's like, not make the rules for assholes. I don't know.


Amy Yeah, yeah.


Grace Let's not make the rules for assholes. And let me tell you something. If you ever see me on a flight and you ask me why I'm still wearing my mask, you gon' get a little clap back because I don't ask you why you're not wearing your mask. Please leave me alone.


Amy So leave her alone. And you know what?


Grace Leave me alone.


Amy That's not the only bummer this week. As always, there's more. So I'm sure you heard about this Bronx apartment fire that happened back in January. It killed 17 people, eight of them children, and more than 60 people were also injured, while the residents are still waiting for millions of dollars in aid. The other hard part about this is that the building is mostly inhabited by Gambian immigrants and other West African people. So basically it's just a bucket of brown people waiting for aid that New York has not yet given. It's four months later, and only a fraction of the aid promise has trickled down to the survivors. The city promised them $4.4 million, and there are about 150 displaced families still waiting.


Grace First of all, 4.4 million does not sound like enough.


Amy It's not.


Grace But as for these pennies you're making these people wai,t like they need a place to live. They need to get new belongings. They probably have children that they need things for that were probably burnt up in the fire. I mean, let's rush things to these people like, you know, what is taking so long. I understand bureaucratic red tape, but, you know, it's an emergency.


Amy Yeah, that's the issue, is that when it's Black and brown, people experiencing an emergency. Remember Hurricane Katrina? Remember Puerto Rico? When it's Black and brown people experiencing the emergency, we're always left waiting.


Grace You know, it's already distressing enough to lose everything that you have in a fire, especially if you're not from here. You don't have family in other places that can help support you, that you're if you're an immigrant already, you're facing a lot of xenophobia and discrimination. Both of us come from immigrant families, so we are very familiar with that. So, you know, anything that we can do to help would be great.


Amy Yeah. So that rounds out our bummer news this week.


Grace Yeah. I mean, the world is a challenging place. Let's just say that.


Amy I'm going to agree with you.


Grace Okay, well, let's get into the antidote, then.


Amy Good. So this is the segment where we tell you about the culture we consumed and things we did this week that made us feel better about the bummer news. So what was your antidote this week, Grace. Let's hear it.


Grace Well, I turned down. I fired up Miz Netflix. Hmm. She's having a bad week, but I. I fired.


Amy Yeah, we got to support our sis.


Grace We got to fire- we got to support our sis. You know.


Amy Ted Sarandos got a Black wife. I want Netflix to do well.


Grace Yes, Sarandos does have a black wife. That is very true. So we support sis. And because of you, him. So let's get into Selling Sunset.


Amy The joy. I didn't realize it dropped. Oh, sh--. I'm behind.


Grace It's Back.


Amy Oh, my God.


Grace And it is full as usual.


Amy Yes.


Grace Of drama.


Amy Yes.


Grace And rich ass real estate and fashion. You know, three things that I love very much. Drama, high class real estate and fashion. So let me first tell you, girls, you know, they got a Black girl designer.


Amy No, they don't. No, they don't know.


Grace They do and she is glorious. Let me tell you about her. Her name is Chelsea Lazkani, I hope I'm saying that right, sis. Forgive me if I'm not, but her name is Chelsea Lazkani. She looks like black Barbie.


Amy Mm hmm.


Grace She. Her fashions are amazing. Her lines are iconic. The the weave is snatched. Everything about this sis is amazing. Now she is coming in friends with Christine. I am I am curious to see if that...


Amy Aligning herself with the darkness, I see.


Grace ..sticks, because, you know, although, Christine, we have to admit that the villains on reality TV do help the show keep going. Yeah, like we need to hate them in order for the show to have some sort of drama about it.


Amy And I need to see her lips keep getting bigger and bigger.


Grace Even though I am not a fan of Christine, I understand her purpose. So she comes in, bring- Christine brings her in, but she is she's like a mom, a wife, and just just killing it on all levels. And I'm looking forward to seeing what her presence is on the show. I'm only like two episodes in, so we will see that. It's just so fun to see all that real estate and the girls are like dripping in Chanel and Bottega and Fendi and like jewels. So it's just fun to look at all these girls, but it's giving me everything that I need. Like I said, I love, like, reality TV because it just really allows me to just soak in and not think about the dramatic structure of things. So I am ready. That is my weekend. I got some work to do, but in between my work Imma be catching up with the girls on Selling Sunset. So, Amy, that was my antidote. What was yours this week?


Amy Well, in a similar fashion. Is that how we're saying fashion now? I'm catching on in a similar fashion.


Grace Yes.


Amy I, too, was committed to Netflix this week, and my antidote was Ali Wong's stand up special "Don Wong." I am obsessed with Ali Wong from day one. I used to watch her clips on Instagram. She would always post videos of her dancing while her husband's looking really bored in the background. Or her kids are like I, why is my mom weird? And I was like, I love this woman. And literally Don Wong. F---, is it good. It's like.


Grace It slaps. 


Amy It hit me right in the feels. And I literally- I've had the busiest week. I've had meetings on meetings, on meetings. I've had so many deadlines. I've turned in things this week and I'm in a waiting process. And like, I started this, taking this class and like I came home from class last night at 11 p.m. I don't know why I even think I have time to take a class, but I came home at like 11:30 and I was like, I haven't had a solitary, even a half hour. That was just for me all week long because it's been so much work and I love my job, but you need to be able to decompress. And even though I was so tired, I literally was like, I just need to do something for me with no agenda attached. And I went on little Netflix and that's how they say in French Netflix. I went on Netflix. And I turned on Don Wong and I sat there. It was 1 a.m. because I came home and I ate and I fix my flowers because y'all know I do my flowers. And I just sat down and I watched Ali Wong and just laughed for a full hour and cried because I was like, I've never felt more seen, but like, the whole thing is just like, I'm a powerful badass and I can't hide it. And-


Grace  Well, first of all, let me validate that whole feeling of needing a moment to yourself, because sometimes I'll be like, I have a crushingly busy day tomorrow and I know it's late and I probably should go to bed, but I need a moment for me before it's tomorrow.


Amy Yeah.


Grace And it starts all over again.


Amy Yeah.


Grace So I love that you did that for yourself. And I love that you still arrange your flowers.


Amy Yeah, thank you. Well, if I didn't, they would die, and that would have given me guilt. So I. I had to, but I was arranging the flowers while watching Don Wong. And I have a couple of friends who we call ourselves monsters because we're so intense about our careers and the things we want and the achievements we have. And watching her, I'm like a fellow monster. And I like, I loved it. And I will say now that I do have a sadness that she you know, the news about her divorce is really what reminded me to watch the special because I hadn't seen it yet. And I do have a real sadness because she was like an inspiration me. Like you can be a monster and have love and like now I'm like, can you? But I just everything she said was so funny, so like-


Grace So Funny.


Amy Raw and real and also, like, just so funny. I don't even want to get into how real it was. It was just so f---ing funny. The jokes were all bangers. She is so good at her job.


Grace Yeah, I like. Okay, I have a few ones that I've thought about.


Amy Yes.


Grace So first of all, I loved that she talked about male comedians versus female comedians, that that fan pussy is delightful, but fan dick is terrifying. I laughed so hard. That is so true. It's just like, you know, there's all these lovely ladies throwing themselves at stand ups, but there's all these, like, creepy men who is, like. I want to stuff you in my trunk and pull out your toenails. I stand. I don't know. It's just so funny. As women who, you know, are successful in our own ways, it's just really funny to hear that verbalized in that way because it is true. It's just like men's romantic opportunities actually increase when they get rich and successful. And for women, oftentimes it decreases. Yeah.


Amy Which is a bummer because when she was like, I have never been chill and I've never wanted to f--- someone who's chill. And I was like, seen. Seen, sis. Seen. It's hard not being a chill woman, but yeah. So that brought me joy, seeing another not chill woman. Speak her mind aggressively and be funny while doing it.


Grace Yeah. And just that she is. It's so dirty. But sorry, Mom and Dad that I said those jokes. I know you listen every week.


Amy LOL.


Grace You know, as women we are so we have so much pressure to be nice and to keep our mouths clean.


Amy Not keep a dick in them.


Grace Yes. It's so nice that she could be that dirty and funny, so. Thank you, Ali Wong.


Amy Yeah, those are some really good antidotes. So, yeah, I hope they made you feel a little better. And I hope you too will support Netflix this week.


Grace Yes, they lost some subscribers, so they need it. Why are we shilling for Netflix? 


Amy I have no idea. Are you sponsoring us? F--- Netflix. Get HBOMax.


Grace I was just like, why did we just all of a sudden become corporate shills? Like for what?


Amy I have no idea. HBOMax, please. I love you the most. You know this. All right. We'll be back after this break. Welcome back to The Antidote. We have a special guest today. Who is it, Grace?    


Grace Well, our guest today is a writer, producer, actor and an Emmy nominated queen of late night comedy who gives me life with her "Amber says what segments" on Late Night with Seth Meyers and hosts the aptly named Emmy nominated Amber Ruffin Show on Peacock. She has written for Seth Meyers, The Detroiters, A Black Lady Sketch Show, and is writing a whole musical adaptation of Some Like It Hot. And if that wasn't enough queen behavior, she is also the bestselling author of You'll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey: Crazy Stories about Racism that she wrote with her sister, Lacey. She is my New York sis and a genuine delight of a human being. Please welcome. Amber Ruffin.


Amber Ruffin Yay, I feel welcomed.


Amy I love it. She is so- Amber, you are so impressive. But we aren't here to talk about any of that sh--, okay? We know you got accomplishments, but we're here to get deep.


Grace Yes. So let's check in first. How are you feeling today? Like. Like for real. Like not small talk. Like, is there anything weighing on you or are you feeling pretty good today?


Amber Ruffin Today was a mess. Today was. If today had a theme, the theme would be these motherf---ers.


Amy Oh. I had one of them days.


Grace Oh, I have those often. Yes, very often. They trying me today. That's that was the theme of my day.


Amber Ruffin Truly. They are trying you.


Amy We feel you.


Amber Ruffin I didn't know. I didn't know if we get like this. But here we are.


Amy Yeah, well, you know, we're here to help raise your vibration. This show is called The Antidote because life is hard, and we all need different antidotes to deal with the bullsh--. So we're here to talk about that. What's your antidote? In other words, what is something non-work related that's bringing you joy this month or this week or this year?


Amber Ruffin So I always wear my hair in a afro and then I'm like half doing it. I don't really care. Everyone I work with is white. When I look bad, no one knows. They don't know any better.


Grace They don't know about edges, girl. They don't know. They don't know. They don't know about edges.


Amy You look great!


Amber Ruffin Little naps around the edges. They love it, they don't care. But then two weeks ago, I got my hair braided up, you know, and, like, cute cornrows. Like wavy cornrows. I was, like-


Grace That's a game changer.


Amber Ruffin This is who I am. I'm lady cornrows. Lady f---ing forever. I will do this every second. I'm not on the show. I'm going to have lady cornrows. It's. This is how I'm going to live now.


Amy That's low key, inspiring me. I did cornrows for just a beat. A couple years ago, I was in between hairstyles, and I was just like, I don't know what to do with my hair. And I did it. And it changed my whole. Like, I stood up straighter. I demanded valet. It just changed who I was.


Amber Ruffin It really did. You got an extra half hour on the top of every morning. You just wake up. Ready? Go.


Amy Yes. And how does it feel? Like greasin the scalp? 


Amber Ruffin So easy. The breeze touches it.


Grace It's- You could get right down in there. And I think that like that moment where you figure out, like, your base has a hairstyle is an iconic moment for every woman, especially a Black woman. Like when we figure out like, oh, this is it. Like, that's, that's. That's a good time to be alive.


Amber Ruffin It truly is.


Amy I fully agree. Did you go anywhere in your cornrows? Did you, like, hit the town?


Amber Ruffin I went to the Super Bowl. I was like, I know I'm out of town.


Grace Okay. So we need to talk about it.


Amy In the Blackest Superbowl of all time.


Grace Blackest Super Bowl of all time. So how was that? Who did you see? Oh, yeah. No, I did see that you went to the Super Bowl. I think I saw an on, on Instagram or something. So, did you see anybody? Cool. Like, what was your experience of that?


Amber Ruffin We sat in front of Heidi Klum. We sat behind Dr. Oz, and we sat next to Jabari Banks, who is the kid who plays Will Smith in the new Fresh Prince reboot. He was my new perfect baby and I love him so bad. And I certainly snatched him up and told him that he was a perfect sweetheart. He was very nice.


Grace Look at you.


Amber Ruffin I love you and your perfect. And he was like, Please, lady, let go of me. You are holding me too tightly. You are not very big but you squeeze like a man.


Grace I mean, that is such a random collection of celebrities. You know what I'm saying like. Like Dr. Oz, like, did they let him out?


Amber Ruffin They did. They did. Who is that cray? But then we saw a lot of fun our little friends at the little pre-party thing like Chris Redd and Sam Jay and-


Grace Oh, that's awesome.


Amber Ruffin All of our cute little NBC babies. It was great. It was great. And the way I got it was NBC was like, do you want to go to the Super Bowl? I was like, No, I don't want to go to no Super Bowl. I don't care. But then I was like, oh, you know what? The only two people I know who love sports, I only know two sports boys, and they're two guys I went to high school with who are still my very good friends. And I, you know, they're a package deal. And I was like, Oh, I can't just take one person. And I said, Can I have two tickets? And they were like, Okay.


Amy Wow, wow. That's how you got it. They didn't say, Haven't you had enough?


Grace The power that flows through you, Amber, just like, just, just two more, two more for my friends.


Amy How did your friends love it?


Amber Ruffin They had so much fun. We had and they're my old friends from high school. So, you know, all our stories are like, oh, you remember the time we drank all that beer? Then we were running down the street streaking. But then now we get to have this new, like, chapter of when we were being wild and old.


Grace Yeah. They get to have, like, our friend's famous now, and she could get. Super Bowl tickets. That's so cool. Yeah, I ain't got it like that yet. Nobody asked me if I wanted to go to the Super Bowl.


Amy But I like that you said "yet." You know it's coming.


Amber Ruffin That's right.


Amy One day. One day. Grace is going to be like, Where are my tickets? I asked for five. I don't know.


Grace Well, it sounds like that gave you, like, joy from, you know, just being in the environment and seeing the halftime show and hanging out with buds from from high school and sharing that experience with them. Yeah.


Amy I have a question for you, Amber. You wrote a book with your sister and it's fantastic. And literally one of the moments, that chapter that you have that's like, I want to put this book down and run away from it. Like, I want to talk about that because obviously and for anyone who hasn't read it yet, you got to pick up our book. It's called You'll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey. It's about her and her sister and the experience of everyday racism that hit their lives. Very relatable content. And that particular chapter addresses the fact that, like, sometimes dealing, re-dealing with the trauma can be a little traumatic. And I'm curious, like how in writing a book like this, how did you find ways to soothe yourself to take care of you?


Amber Ruffin Yeah, I had to cut down everything else. Like, you know, how in your normal life you'll be like, can you believe this congressman said this racist thing? Can you believe this child got shot, blah, blah, blah, blah. And it's just, you know, you're talking about the goings on of now. And I was like, oh, we- as we write this book, we will not be doing it. 


Amy Yeah, we will. Absolutely not be doing that.


Grace  Did you just, like, not go on to Twitter, like, at all? 


Amber Ruffin Oh, maybe a little bit.


Grace Mm hmm.


Amber Ruffin In at work. I would look at the news for work.


Amy Right. Right.


Amber Ruffin The second I'm in my house we're not talking about it. I don't want to hear about it. We will not be watching the news today. But that's how you do it, is you compartmentalize that you don't have too much of.


Amy Any more compartments. It's like it's a glass of water dealing with racism, a glass of water. And it was filled with the book. You didn't have room for the daily news. You didn't have room for the other things.


Grace And I can completely relate to that because, yes, sometimes it can just get so overwhelming and like, you still have to live life.


Amy How? How? I mean, I know your job is reading the news, processing the news, and also making jokes about the news. Does the comedy of it help? Like, does it help not feel so erert?


Amber Ruffin It helps to have a take on it and I have a bit about it. And then it feels like I have handled this, you know, it feels like you've done something about it. I didn't do anything, but it feels like you did. You know, I took this bit, this horrible bit of news, and I wrote a song about it. Yeah, that's how you do it.


Amy But it is.


Grace But it is helpful because you know what? Like somebody is somebody who doesn't experience things like we do is going to, like, hear your take about it and maybe think about it in a different way, you know, with a laugh or, you know, I'm not like just processing it in a different way so you reframing it is actually helping. So you're so accomplished. And obviously and do you have like a non-career related accomplishment that you're super proud of?


Amy I love that question.


Amber Ruffin What a great thing to pretend to have.


Amy No, you do. You do.


Amber Ruffin I like to paint my nails.


Amy Oh, wait, wait. You did that yourself?


Grace You did that?


Amber Ruffin Yeah.


Amy Okay, so this is a podcast. I'm going to describe her nails. They are black, right? Black paint and also gold polka dots. But the polka dots are almost like little lines.


Grace It's like a-


Amy Pointing down in a pattern. It's perfect. It looks-.


Grace Oh, my God, you did that yourself.


Amy It looks like a window pane. Like like stained glass.


Grace Amber. Amber is a full nail tech.


Amy What


Amber Ruffin I love to do my nails.


Amy With regular polish are like, do you use like gel? Like it looks so professional. Wow. Ok, see?Look at that.


Grace No, I'm just so impressed. I like like - listeners. It's, it's like, literally like a trellis.


Amy Her nails are beautiful. They're art. Like, put them in the MoMA, their art.


Grace You should be proud of that.


Amy I like literally, I paid for these and mine is broke. Look at these. Broken.


Amber Ruffin No.


Grace No, look. Look at this. Yeah, mine broke, too.


Amy Another question for you. You posted a Valentine's Day animation short about cloning yourself.


Amber Ruffin Yeah.


Amy And it starts with a really cute self love story, and then it turns really, really dark. I'm not going to spoil it, because everyone should just scroll back through Amber Ruffin's Instagram and find it. It's so good. But your caption was what struck me. You said, love yourself today and everyday, and if you've seen this short, you'll be a little confused by that. I want to know why that caption and then also to you, what is, what is loving yourself today and every day look like feel like?


Amber Ruffin Thank you so much for mentioning that video. I'm so proud of that. I think I've got all kinds of sh--, that video every Valentine's Day, I go this video video's the sh--. I do all kinds of stuff on TV and here and there and be like, that was fine. But that little animated video, I think, is one of the best things I've ever done. It makes me laugh so f---ing hard. So weird.


Grace Oh, my God.


Amber Ruffin What do I do to love myself? I don't really. I am bad at this. I don't take time out for me. I don't set aside. I don't have any rituals. I don't have any treats I give myself.


Amy Except your nails.


Amber Ruffin Except my nails.


Grace Your nails.


Amber Ruffin I will sit down and do my nails. Oh, I'm so cute. But I do really like myself very badly.


Amy And I love that.


Amber Ruffin I don't think I'm dangerously cocky, but I would be lying if I didn't say I was cocky. Like I like me. I think I'm great. I think I'm doing it. I think I'm cute.


Grace You are.


Amber Ruffin It's bad. It's bad.


Amy Wait, wait. Did you always. You always felt that?


Amber Ruffin 100%.


Amy What do you think it's like from your family, from your parents, or like just?


Amber Ruffin It's because I'm youngest of five.


Grace Mhm.


Amber Ruffin Everyone said everything I did, they would go, that's right. Good job. You do it. What a beautiful song. The baby sang a song. Don't you love it? Good job, baby. I'd be like, yeah, I did. And no matter what I did, no matter how it looked or sounded every you know, I have three older sisters and mom and dad, and my older brother. And they would all be like, Aww, alright, you're doing it! I love that. All the time. And then I think it really created a monster. It really did.


Grace No, it created-.


Amy Such a protective monster.


Amber Ruffin I do think also like it's also a combo of like, oh, well, whatever happens happens because I'm having so much fun. And fun has always been my goal instead of getting things and doing.


Amy I love that.


Amber Ruffin You know, so-


Amy I'm going to adjust my thoughts.


Amber Ruffin Because I always- the goal has always been fun and I've been chasing the fun and good stuff just happened at me. But I wasn't really after that. I was after how can I be the goofiest, the loudest, and then everything else just kind of fell into place. And I think that's why I've been allowed to be so cocky because it hasn't been. It's just like, Yeah, I can sing an improvised song and I can host the improv show, you know?


Amy Yeah.


Grace Yeah.


Amber Ruffin You can be cocky about it all you like, but a thousand people can also do that. But you know, feeling cocky and good about that, you know, and getting that response from the audience is, I think what created a monster.


Amy I, but I love the focus on I actually want to just like circle that also not just for people listening but also for myself because I need to remember that the fun.


Grace Yeah.


Amy The fun and following the making sure that you're having fun because it's that thing where it's like we, we chose this industry. We chose we didn't come from a line, long line of improvisers who made you, said we have to keep the family talk show going. Like that didn't happen. So it's like you you're doing this because it's fun and chasing the fun as opposed to chasing the accolades or like the I don't know, the thing that you've also gotten, like the viewership or the renewals, like you also got that, but not because you're chasing that. You got that because you're chasing a really great feeling.


Amber Ruffin Chasing the fun. Yeah. I was like, I'm not going to ever have children because yuck, so I'm my baby.


Grace You talking to the right two? Okay. But yeah, I do. Like, I wake up every morning with a ton of gratitude for what I get to do with my life. But sometimes I do be letting people try me and I forget like that. This is all fun stuff that we do. So.


Amber Ruffin Yeah.


Amy This day may have started with these motherf---ers be trying.


Amber Ruffin Motherf---ers.


Amy But you know what? We're going out on the fun. I feel so much better now that we've talked to you. Do you have anything coming up that you want to tell us about? Anything you'd like to plug? It can even be something that you just love and not something that you created.


Amber Ruffin Something I love is that frickin Bel Air remake is the sh--.


Grace You like it?


Amber Ruffin It is the sh--. I saw the first three episodes.


Amy It's good. Yeah.


Amber Ruffin I was like, this is the absolute best. I just didn't know you could do that.


Amy It's so cool.


Amber Ruffin I'd never seen such a thing. I've never seen a remake of something with-


Grace In a different tone.


Amber Ruffin A completely different cast and a completely different tone. But you still make all the connections. You still feel like it's the same people. It's insane.


Amy Watching it. You're like, Why aren't they making jokes? You still, like, understand everything that's happening? Yeah. And the guy who plays Will Smith is really good. I think that they I don't know in the marketing he didn't like talk in the marketing is a lot of like looks and like they're trying to sell drama, drama, drama. So when the show starts and he talks for the first time, I was like, Oh, and I just like his voice and his demeanor. He's so good.


Amber Ruffin He's-


Amy Your baby's good, Amber.


Amy I raised him by myself.


Grace You raised him.


Amy And then you yeeted him.


Grace From the Super Bowl.


Amber Ruffin In Philadelphia and I yeeted him to LA.


Amy That is amazing.


Grace No. But but yeah, but we should- you should also like, you know, promote your show.


Amber Ruffin Also while you're on Peacock, which is free and not like put in your credit card and then later they'll charge you and you forgot. We don't need your credit card number, keep it. Don't even take it out of their wallet. Just put your email in there. Make up an email. We don't give a f---. We're Peacock.


Amy What?


Amber Ruffin The Amber Ruffin Show.


Amy That's their tagline.


Grace Yeah. And you can actually choose Amber as your what? Your avatar.


Amber Ruffin That's right.


Grace So.


Amy What?


Grace Yes.


Amy I am doing that tonight.


Grace Yeah, that's what I'm saying, like it's very adorable. It's a little- because, you know, she's a friend. So I'm just like, is this creepy of me that I have this?


Amber Ruffin I love it.


Amy Yes. 


Amber Ruffin Let them make a Grace avatar. See how fast I choose it.


Grace Wonderful


Amy Thank you so much, Amber.


Grace Thank you so much for being here.


Amber Ruffin Thank you for having me. We win.


Amy Yes.


Grace Yay. We did it. Okay. So now we're going to do our creative tap in, in which we tap, tap, tap in to our creativity. Amy and I are both writers, so being creative brings us joy. And this is a podcast about joy.


Amy So Grace is going to surprise me with a quote about creativity, and I'm going to let her know what it makes me think.


Grace "Eliminate something superfluous from your life, break a habit. Do something that makes you feel insecure." And that's by Piero Ferrucci.


Amy Hmm.


Grace I'll read it again. "Eliminate something superfluous from your life. Break a habit. Do something that makes you feel insecure."


Amy That's great. When I think of eliminate something and I say superfluous. I don't know if that's right, but I say superfluous.


Grace Oh, that's probably how you say it.


Amy No, no, no. I don't know. Because I said "uh-folstery" until I was like 15. So don't listen to me. But when I think of eliminate something superfluous from your life, I think at first I started thinking like Marie Kondo style, like stuff. But then the second part of the quote that was Do something that makes you insecure, break a habit. I started thinking of actions that are superfluous and I was like, Yes, there's something I won't be able to name right now, what I plan to eliminate. But when I think of it that way, like break a habit, do something that makes you insecure, I think of like, what are the things you do that you don't need to do? And there's this book called I think Atomic Habits. I haven't read it yet. It's on my list, but it's about like basically listing out the things in your day that you repeat every day and then figuring out what are the things you don't need. And this is what that quote makes me think of. And I want to do this quote. It sounds like very productive. And it sounds like when you feel insecure, when you lean into places or parts of you or, or ways of behavior that kind of like undo your norm, I think it leads to creativity. I remember we had homework in grad school at one point where our professor said, like, sleep on the other side of the bed for the weekend. And then we had to come in and talk about what it felt like and this is what this quote makes me think of. So now I want to do it. It's cool. What does it make you think of, Grace?


Grace Well, it makes me think of giving myself grace.


Amy Ooh, cute.


Grace Because, yeah. Giving myself myself, you know? But it makes me think of like, very. I am not the most productive person. Like, I used to beat up on myself a lot for that, but I'm not. I have allowed myself to get help for things in a way that I used to feel guilty about, but now I don't. So I have allowed myself to get a meal delivery service instead of feeling like I had to cook every day. Like I used to feel like I had to cook every day because that's what I saw my mom doing. And I felt like I wasn't being a good grownup if I didn't cook every day, so I allowed myself to do that. But still, like the break a habit thing that that's like the most interesting part of it. Like that thing that you said about sleeping on the other side of the bed. I'm just like, what are things that I have sort of become accustomed to doing all the time that I could just shake up in my life? So it it does like make me excited to think about it after and see if there is anything that I could just do differently to give myself like a different creative charge. It's kind of like, you know, in The Artist's Way, like this book that I, I live by or whatever. But in the Artist's Way, they talk about taking yourself on an artist date, meaning, like doing just like a small activity for yourself that's like outside of what you would normally do, like go to a museum or whatever.


Amy I love that.


Grace And so like, it almost is like- on my artist day when I go on a hike or do a different kind of exercise that I am not used to doing because it's like, oh, like this makes my brain fire in a different way. And I'm seeing things that I wouldn't normally see, you know?


Amy Yeah, I love that. It also kind of makes me think of Amber like, leaning into fun and the idea of like, Oh, do something that makes you feel insecure. Like, she literally sings a song about the news or whatever, and I'm like, Oh yeah, we should all find the things in our day. Like, that's fun and weird and quirky and like different and lean into the insecurity of that and just like, let yourself play.


Grace Yeah, I think that's such a thing that you miss as an adult, just in general, that sense of play or that sense of joy. And I think that's part of the reason people love having kids is because like kids remind you of that sense of play and that sense of joy. But you know, those of us who don't have them, like we can find that in our daily lives, too, just like, you know, put on some music and dance or like the other day I was like doing Toni Braxton choreography in my bathroom, and I was just like, if anybody can see me now. But like, my favorite thing that she said today was that to chase the fun and, you know, you definitely do that at first. Like when I first started were- doing theater and I first started dancing. When I first started singing, it was just because it was fun, you know, there wasn't anything really attached to it. But then, you know, this becomes our career and then, you know, writing becomes work and acting becomes work and all these things become work. But we should think about going back to that initial spark of fun that we originally had. And I think for any- no matter what you do, listeners, I think they you can take that because, you know, there is a reason why you chose what you chose to do with your life.


Amy Oh, oh. That makes me feel so good. I just want to sit in that for a moment. I really love that.


Grace Well, thanks for listening to The Antidote. We hope this injected a little bit of joy into your week. I know it did mine. How about you, Amy?


Amy I feel good, girl. We should do this again sometime. Oh. We'll be here next week.


Amy And in the meantime, if you'd like to follow us on social, follow me, Grace at GracyActt. That's G-R-A-C-Y-A-C-T.


Amy And follow me Amy at AmyAniobi. That's A-M-Y-A-N-I-O-B-I. And follow the show at theeantidotepod.


Grace That's a thee with two E's.


Amy If you like feeling good about yourself, please subscribe at Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.


Grace Goodbye.


Amy And remember to chase the fun. The Antidote is hosted by us Amy Aniobi and Grace Edwards. It's produced by Jenna Hanchard and our associate producer is Taylor Polydore.


Grace Our executive producer is Erica Kraus and our editor is Erika Janik. Sound Mixing by Evan Clark.


Amy Digital Production by Mijoe Sahiouni. Talent Booking by Marianne Ways. Our theme music was composed and produced by TT The Artist and Cosmo The Truth.


Grace APM Studio executives in charge are Chandra Kavati, Alex Schaffert and Joanne Griffith. Concept created by Amy Aniobi and Grace Edwards.


Amy Send us your antidotes at And remember to follow us on social media at theeantidotepod. That's thee with two E's.


Grace The Antidote is a production of American Public Media.


Amy Ow, ow.